Dating Violence Info for Parents | Violence Prevention Works!
Dating violence is controlling, abusive, and aggressive behavior in a Talk to someone you trust like a parent, teacher, school principal, counselor, or nurse. Teen Dating Statistics: Women ages 16 to 24 experience the highest per capita rates of intimate violence- nearly 20 per women. (Bureau of Justice Special . conversations and can offer important information and insights into dating abuse. Dating violence or relationship abuse is a pattern of violent behavior that.
Angela Oswalt, MSW It is a sad fact that today's youth are much more likely to be exposed to violence and abuse than youth of previous generations: Often, it is quite difficult for parents to intervene in these complex situations but there are several steps that parents can take to limit their children's exposure to these dangers.
Abusive Relationships and Dating Violence Approximately 9. Dating and romantic relationships are characterized by emotional and physical intimacy. Because both emotional and physical intimacy occur in private between two people, violence and abuse can remain well hidden and may continue over a long period of time.
The cloak of secrecy is further reinforced because victims of dating and relationship violence often feel powerless, frightened, and ashamed; therefore, they are reluctant to report their experiences because they may feel they are somehow at fault; or they may have reasonable fears that the violence will escalate if they disclose their experiences to another person. Dating and relationship violence includes any type of physical, sexual, or emotional abuse that occurs between dating partners.
Abusers seek to gain control over their victims by manipulating or dominating them. At its core, dating and relationship violence is about one person misusing power to control another person. Anyone, of any age or gender, can become a victim of dating and relationship violence and dating violence is reported in both heterosexual and same-sex couples.
Dating violence includes both direct acts of violence and abuse, as well as indirect violence and abuse such threatening to harm the victim or threatening to harm someone or something they care about siblings, pets, possessions, etc.
Both direct and indirect violence and abuse serve to intimidate and control the victim. Examples of physical abuse include pushing, shoving, slapping, kicking, knocking down, hitting and punching; or gestures that threaten to perform these behaviors e. Sexual abuse and assault include any unwanted sexual contact or sexual coercion.
Emotional abuse may include yelling, screaming, name-calling, belittling or demeaning a person with words or gestures. Emotional abuse is particularly insidious because it not as overt as other forms of abuse. Parents should make certain their youth both boys and girls have a clear understanding of what behaviors are completely unacceptable in any relationship.
Protecting Teens from Abusive Relationships and Dating Violence
Furthermore, youth should be taught to have zero tolerance for any abusive, coercive, or disrespectful language or behavior, whether it is directly or indirectly threatening, and should immediately seek help to terminate any relationship with anyone who subjects them to such an experience.
Perpetrators manipulate their victims by belittling and demeaning them. Over time, victims begin to adopt a self-image that is consistent with statements made by their abuser; i. Therefore, it is important for youth to recognize this type of behavior early in a relationship and to exit that relationship promptly.
Abusive partners will usually try to isolate victims from their friends and family in order to avoid detection, and to gain greater power and control over their victims. Abusers employ many methods to isolate victims, some very subtle. An abuser may directly tell their partner they may not socialize with someone, or the abuser may become so unpleasant when their victim spends time with others that eventually the victim "chooses" not to spend time with other people.
For instance, an abuser may demand the victim always tell them where they are, and may insist upon an immediate response to their phone calls, texts, and other communications while they are with other people.
Eventually meeting these demands becomes so unpleasant or embarrassing that the victim gradually discontinues contact with other people. Another way abusers isolate their victims is to monopolize their time by demanding the victim spend more and more time with them instead of socializing with others, doing homework, going to work, or doing other activities.
Protecting Teens From Abusive Relationships And Dating Violence
Perpetrators also control and to manipulate their partners by threatening to hurt themselves or to kill themselves if the partner leaves the relationship. Be afraid of getting hurt more seriously. Feel protective of your boyfriend or girlfriend.
Get Help Being a victim of dating violence is not your fault. Nothing you say, wear, or do gives anyone the right to hurt you. If you think you are in an abusive relationship, get help immediately.
Dating Violence: What Every Parent Should Know
Don't keep your concerns to yourself. Talk to someone you trust like a parent, teacher, school principal, counselor, or nurse. If you choose to tell, you should know that some adults are mandated reporters. This means they are legally required to report neglect or abuse to someone else, such as the police or child protective services.
What Do Parents Need to Know About Teen Dating Violence?
You can ask people if they are mandated reporters and then decide what you want to do. Some examples of mandated reporters are teachers, counselors, doctors, social workers, and in some cases, coaches or activity leaders. If you want help deciding whom to talk to, call a crisis line in your area. Help Yourself Think about ways you can be safer.
This means thinking about what to do, where to go for help, and who to call ahead of time. Where can you go for help? Who can you call? How will you escape a violent situation? Here are other precautions you can take: Let friends or family know when you are afraid or need help. When you go out, say where you are going and when you'll be back. In an emergency, call or your local police department. Memorize important phone numbers, such as the people to contact or places to go in an emergency.
Keep spare change, calling cards, or a cell phone handy for immediate access to communication.