Ask Erin: Should I Leave My Boyfriend Who Has No Ambition? | Ravishly | Media Company
You love your boyfriend, but he has no goals or motivation for his future. Here's how to be in a relationship with a guy who isn't ambitious about work, school, You can't motivate him to get a better job or make more money or stop playing .. it when you come to visit, as the date of our visit was a few days after his birthday. As long as he is self-sufficient, and happy with what he does, then I really wouldn' t care. When A Man Chooses His Ambition Instead Of Love With You Not emotionally or romantically selfish, of course not. . 7 Sweetly Romantic Date Night Spots In Washington DC in Ambition, Career Before Love, Love & Dating, Love & Relationships, Putting Your Career First, Selfish Men, Selfishness.
Remember that selfishness disguised as ambition is a prioritization of an upcoming triumph that no amount of time nor self-enclosed focus can ever actually promise a person.
The only thing selfishness guarantees us is separation. Because selfishness does not invite us into the world, it only ever secludes us. Why take that chance? And, anyway, who are we fooling?
Selfishness has never been commendable. And often, they were totally indulgent with that time. And equally famished for it, too. But, the beauty, if not heroism, was that they were never too consumed for matters of the heart, too bothered and important for it either.
Dating a Guy with no Drive or Ambition | Futurescopes
In fact, their heroism—their greatness—was well evidenced in that quality of theirs, in the humbling juxtaposition between their investment in the creation process as well as their commitment to pressing pause just as easily so they could step away from themselves and give love and be loved by the people—the support system—laying in wait.
Men of excellence juggle these two realities. But they juggle them in such a way that they run in tandem with each other.
Fortunately, I believe we complement each other. Most importantly, as we became serious with each other, the most important component that made us click was that our values were in sync. We wanted the same things.
Our visions for the future lined up.
Dating a Guy with no Drive or Ambition
I think this is of vital importance for a happy and healthy relationship. Many of us, myself included, have spent time in relationships where there was love, but something was missing, something that ultimately could not be avoided.
Know that you can let go with love. Know that you may be able to have a friendship with this man at some point, even if that takes some time. Know that being fair means being honest with each other about what you want and need from a relationship, and that you deserve those things.
While this ability to be emotionally responsive is crucial for any meaningful relationship, it is especially rare to come across it in a man and thus one to be cherished wholeheartedly. A creative personality Then again men who are less driven in professional or business worlds, are more likely to be highly creative people — this is because most artistic and creative pursuits require a measure of contemplation and imagination — traits which hardly gel with over-riding ambition or cut-throat competitiveness.
The best part about dating such a guy is that you are likely to be wooed and courted in a highly individualistic manner. If you partner has excellent culinary skills, he just might whip up a special dessert for your birthday. On the other hand if he is a singer, you may be lucky to have a song written, set to music and sung just for you amidst a hundred people. Creative people are spontaneous, non-judgmental and best of all have a unique way of showing their love which makes their partners feel so very special.
More time on his hands If you are careful to simply date a less driven man casually and not start depending on him for financial support, you may find that the absence of professional ambition has its own rewards even.
When A Man Chooses His Ambition Instead Of Love With You
He will thus be game to meet you at any time after his normal work hours and probably have more leisure time which you can put to good use in your love life.
Again if you both are in a steady relationship, he will be home to take care of chores or even pick up your kids from school, if you have any. Despite popular culture representing a man with no professional ambition as a loser, dating him is hardly the same as an unemployed person.
One of the consequences of living in a keenly materialistic and consumerist society is that anybody who is not slaving away for the next promotion or commission is seen as lacking drive and purpose in life. The truth however is that there are different kinds of goals that a person may wish to work towards in his lifetime. A man who does not care about moving into the glass-fronted office may have plans of writing a book, trekking through mountain trails in Bhutan or volunteering at a save-the-whales campaign.