TRUE STORY: "My husband doesn't know I share him with my twin sister." | Her World
I have a situation and would LOVE some advice. I started out really liking my sister-in-law but then I started noticing that she is flirty with my. Your new sister-in-law may be protective of her sibling, but you can make to each other in different ways and establish a respectful, loving relationship. Pick a date once a month and try out a spot that you've been eyeing. My wife's sister (my sister in law) has been a widow now for 4 years. Is it inappropriate for me to ask her about possible dating with a long term The reason I post this question here is that I love that metafilter members don't.
So what he started doing was providing me food every day. In other words he would buy groceries and I was free to use whatever I wanted. This worked out for awhile but it was becoming expensive driving back and forth everyday with no income coming in.
I spoke with my parents just to make sure nobody would be creeped out by this and told them that this was just a babysitting gig to help keep my niece close to me.
I felt like in many ways this was a way of keeping my sister close to me as well. She discovered that he felt the same way that she did after stumbling across a Facebook messenger conversation Brian had with his brother. There have been many of nights one of us has held the other as they cried.
In many ways this has been very helpful getting through this, I actually feel like I get strength from him sometimes when I get sad and I really feel like I have helped him as well.
TRUE STORY: "My husband doesn't know I share him with my twin sister."
He has had grief counseling over the past two years. I know for a fact he has not seen, dated or really even looked at another woman. In fact about 6 months after the funeral, he told me he would never get married again and did not see him ever loving anyone again.
I know that was the hurt talking but for about 3 years now he has held fast to that. Despite my best efforts and believe me I know how sick this is and how much I am not honoring my sister but I have fallen in love with him.
We have never touched each other in anything other than the gentle hugs of people comforting one another. To be honest I know he feels the same way I do. How do I know that you might ask, well here is where I further admit to being a bad person.
Before marrying my grandmother, my grandfather married her sister this was in Italy. It's often a very natural scenario for many people. As long as that's what people want, then it's totally appropriate. Wishing you all the best! Romantic feelings can be built on this kind of close, bonded, trusting relationship, so I'm not sure what this means. I'm not trying to call someone out, I just think this statement is questionable.
Helping each other through hard times is what a marriage is about, really, when you boil it all down -- at least in my view; some people obviously differ on that opinion. I say go for it, OP - if y'all are close, it should be OK. Take it super, super slow, don't push, and talk to her about it. Also, I'm sorry for your loss, and for your friend's loss as well.
Losing a wife or a sister is not easy. Just make sure you broach the subject with a built-in out in case she just wants to remain platonic family.
When Your Sister-In-Law is a Jealous #$%^* | Newlywed Blog
I would be very careful, however, because you do have a long friendship that it would be sad to lose. Out of curiosity, have you sought any kind of grief therapy? I ask because--and only because--if you were a member of my family, I might worry that there's a chance that what you are attracted to is the continuity and the company more than the woman herself.
That doesn't mean she isn't a lovely person, and it also doesn't mean that it's not a good reason to want to spend your life with her.
But your loss is still relatively recent, and I can see how a relationship with this woman could help soothe many of the difficult feelings you must be experiencing. Again, that's not a reason not to be with her--if you two want a relationship, I wish you every happiness--but if I were her, I might worry whether you loved me for me, or because I help fill a void. But then, people marry for all kinds of reasons, and that's a perfectly legitimate reason to be together.
And you sound like a thoughtful person who isn't crashing into this blindly, which is good. All this to say: Maybe speak to a grief counselor, if you haven't already, and consider dating, if you haven't already. I am sorry for your loss. Whatever you decide to do, I hope you find happiness. I say give it a go. IF she's actually into the idea, I mean. Granted, this was many years ago, but after his wife died my great-grandpa married her sister.
I don't think anyone thought it was weird. If you think she feels the same way, go for it! Since neither of you have dated, it could be that a large part of the attraction here is safety and familiarity. You don't have to go back 'on the market,' as it were, because someone who is already part of your life is right here.
But it could also be fine for you to see and get to know other women who have no connection to your wife. There are so many absolutely wonderful women who are available because of a spouse's earlier death. Since you haven't tried any dating at all, I would recommend questioning yourself as to whether your feelings are very strong, or whether, in some way, this represents an easy way out.
Otherwise, just fine and ethical.
I’m In Love With My Dead Sister’s Husband | MadameNoire
This is my biggest concern, and I think it bears repeating. I would be very hesitant to discuss a romantic relationship with her unless you are quite sure she will at least be open-minded about it. She might be uncomfortable or offended by the very idea of it, and it could greatly affect your friendship. In High School, my female best friend and I began dating, and it basically ruined our friendship. It was a little weird at first, but now we get along well and it is just a fun story to tell mutual acquaintances: You have both been through a lot of life's circumstances and have earned the right to make your own decisions regardless of what others think.
I would go for it slowly if I were you. Rather, this is wonderful. Fast forward another year or two, and they get married, so now my ex girlfriend is my sister-in-law Friend turns out to be a big asshole, me and the sister start dating.
Meet her friends, turns out her and her sister hang in the same group. We date a couple years, I start attending family events regularly. Her sister starts becoming more comfortable around me, sees me as a brother now. Her sister has been the most helpful person planning our wedding. We talked about everything once and agreed not to talk about it again unless something changes. He lied to me for years about their relationship while I knew they were into each other.
How did I know?