7 Warning Signs That You Are Dating a Loser | PairedLife
We have all been there at one time or another — fallen head-over-heels for someone, despite an abundance of red flags waving in our face. "At that moment God reminded me of all the losers I tried to marry, how submitting to them would have been impossible, and what a train wreck my life could. Red Flags has 33 ratings and 8 reviews. White said: I read this during a most trying time when I was about to leave a bad marriage and I continued to rea.
As we recall, Drew Peterson bought his wife a motorcycle and expensive jewelry even during the period of time when he was criticizing her, throwing her up against the wall, isolating her from her loved ones, accusing her of infidelity and calling her pejorative names.
Which is why, as Dr. The cycle starts when they are intentionally hurtful and mean.
7 Warning Signs That You Are Dating a Loser
You may be verbally abused, cursed, and threatened over something minor. Suddenly, the next day they become sweet, doing all those little things they did when you started dating. The psychopath invariably cycles back to his real, nasty self.
Over time, the meanness cycle escalates in severity and increases in duration. The other purpose of the mean cycle is to allow The Loser to say very nasty things about you or those you care about, again chipping away at your self-esteem and self-confidence.
They deny obvious facts and accuse their victims of wrongdoing. Their spurious logic goes something like this: According to him, they lied about being hit by him. They also lied about his verbal abuse.
He never hit them, even if Kathy had to go to the emergency room to recover from his blows.
Red Flags: How to Know When You're Dating a Loser
Psychopaths need to maintain control of everything in their lives, especially their romantic relationships. When they get bored with one partner or find a replacement, they can leave her on the spur of the moment, heartlessly, often without even bothering to offer an explanation. But they get very angry when the tables are turned and their partners leave them. Yet when they wanted to leave him to escape the misery and abuse, he resorted to violence, threats, bribes and, when none of these strategies worked, probably murder.
Believe it or not, I actually had a potential suitor tell me that he loved me on our very first date together! Whilst this is all very flattering, you do really need to sit back and ask yourself if this behaviour is consistent with that of a normal, well-adjusted individual. Yes, of course we have all heard of whirlwind romances, but these are the exception to the rule and not the norm. So why does a loser do this? Why waste your time making plans for the future, if he has no intention of following them through?
In truth, whatever he says means very little to him.
He lives in a fantasy world where nothing is real to him. A loser has extremely superficial emotions and is capable of falling in and out of love on a whim. He Blows Hot and Cold He loves me, he loves me not. From calling and texting you daily, you may suddenly not hear from a loser for days or weeks on end. Just as you begin re-building your life, out of nowhere, he pops up. He behaves as if nothing has happened and expects to pick up the relationship, exactly where you left off.
This sends you into a tailspin and sets you off on a roller coaster of emotions. You may even reach a milestone in your life where you begin questioning your own sanity and wonder if you are going crazy.
red flags you’re dating a loser | Psychopathyawareness's Blog
At this point, it is important to remember only one thing. It is his behaviour that is irrational and not yours. Your friends and family may spot the signs and try to alert you to their concerns. Nonetheless, you are oblivious to the issues they raise and dismiss their fears without so much as a second thought. The grave danger in doing this, is that their views are usually far more objective than yours. When your nearest and dearest tells you that they do not like the person that you are dating, you really need to view this as a red flag.
Remember, they love you and want nothing more than to see you happy.
However, they see how he treats you. They see the effect that it has on you. They see how dating this guy has changed you into a shadow of your former self. Try and see the situation from their perspective. Also, do not forget that these are the very people who will be there for you, picking up the pieces, long after the loser has disappeared.
He is unfaithful to you. He asks to borrow money off you. He fails to turn up for a date. All of the above. He also has a penchant for lying, albeit badly at times. Nonetheless, he will never admit that he was lying, even if he is caught red-handed.
As time goes on, the loser will begin to cancel dates or possibly, not not show up at all.
10 Red Flags You’re Dating a Loser | hummuscidalmaniac
He will make endless promises that he has no intention of keeping. Red Flag 1; Showering you with gifts early in the relationship, in this case before the relationship even started. We started dating exclusively soon after my 18th birthday and he insisted on picking me up for dates and doing all the driving, which I thought was sweet, but he would always show up a minimum of 20 minutes later than he said he would, usually more like an hour, and offer no explanation whatsoever.
Red flag 2; Having no respect for your time. We never had a talk regarding our relationship status, Scott just started introducing himself to my friends as my boyfriend and I went with it. He told me he loved me on our third date. Red Flag 3; moving too fast, especially if your partner is making decisions about your relationship status without your input. Our first Christmas together was approaching, Scott dropped many hints that he planned on buying me an engagement ring, he asked for my ring size, he asked my mom what styles I liked I specifically did not want a diamond!
I wanted an amethyst set in silver.