It could be similarity in terms of sociodemographics – most relationships are formed between people who are similar in terms of age, social. Braxton-Davis, Princess () "The Social Psychology of Love and Attraction," . dating and relationship process (Luo &. Zhang .. studies was the personality. Dating and Mating: The Social Psychology of Attraction and Romantic Relationships, by Madeleine A Fugère, Ph.D.
Modern Love: Scientific Insights from 21st Century Dating
In a study, Fiore and Judith Donath Massachusetts Institute of Technology examined messaging data from 65, users of a United States-based dating site. They found that users preferred sameness on all of the categories they tested a variety of features from child preferences to education to physical features like height. But some factors played a larger role than others, with marital status and wanting or already having children showing the strongest same-seeking.
Fiore has also found that women responded more frequently to men whose popularity on the site a measure based on the average number of people contacting the user per day was similar to their own Fiore, Hitsch and colleagues found that similarity was strongly preferred in a variety of factors, including age, education, height, religion, political views, and smoking. They also found a strong same-race preference. Interestingly, women have a more pronounced same-race preference, and this preference is not always revealed in their stated preferences Hitsch, et al.
Online dating service users tend to contact people who are about as attractive as they are, but does your own attractiveness level influence how attractive you believe others to be?
The site was launched in purely for users to rate each other on how attractive or, obviously, not they were. Later, the site added an online dating component. Consistent with previous research, this study, published in Psychological Science, found that people with similar levels of physical attractiveness indeed tend to date each other, with more attractive people being more particular about the physical attractiveness of their potential dates.
Compared to females, males are more influenced by how physically attractive their potential dates are, but less affected by how attractive they themselves are when deciding whom to date.
But these findings about gender bias in attraction are being challenged in other studies — more on this later. Stretching or Shrinking the Truth Assessing potential partners online hinges on other users being truthful in their descriptions. Psychological scientists have turned to online dating to examine how truthful people are in their descriptions of themselves, both with themselves and to others.
Online daters walk a fine line — everyone wants to make themselves as attractive as possible to potential dates, making deception very tempting. Catalina Toma, Jeffrey Hancock both at Cornell Universityand Nicole Ellison Michigan State University examined the relationship between actual physical attributes and online self-descriptions of online daters in New York. They found that lying was ubiquitous, but usually fairly small in terms of magnitude.
Modern Love: Scientific Insights from 21st Century Dating – Association for Psychological Science
Men tended to lie about height and women tended to lie about weight. Another modern dating innovation may provide a better solution: Since then, speed dating has spread around the world, giving millions of singles a chance at love. It also gives savvy researchers an unprecedented chance to study attraction in situ. This hunch was confirmed by a speed dating outing with several other Northwestern colleagues, and the researchers embarked a new track of speed dating work.
No word on whether the outing was a success from other standpoints. As Finkel and Eastwick point out in a study published in Current Directions in Psychological Science, the popularity of speed dating allows the collection of large, real world samples across cultures, ethnicities, and socioeconomic levels.
The speed dating design also lets researchers to study both sides of a dyadic process. Also, speed dating allows for exploring reciprocity effects.
A Psychological Science article Eastwick et al. It also allows for testing actual versus stated preferences.Psychology 9C/Psychology & Behavior 11C. Lec 6: Relationships & Interpersonal Attraction
One speed dating study showed that stated preferences do not match actual preferences and called into question the gender biases in attraction that have been well-documented elsewhere i. Speed dating studies also allow researchers to study the implications of simple changes in dating paradigms. This idea holds true at speed dating events, where women generally stay seated while the men rotate. This set-up stems from vague notions of chivalry, but also from more mundane purposes — according to one speed dating company executive, women tend to have more stuff with them, like purses, and are therefore less efficient movers.
Could this set-up in itself affect attraction? Turns out that it can. In most speed dating scenarios as in most attraction scenarios in general women are more selective. But, when women rotated, this effect disappeared and they became less selective than the men. T he search for love is never easy and attraction is never simple.
Research into online matchmaking and speed dating is providing valuable insight into the human quest for romance, and this is only the beginning. Most of the research in this area to-date focuses on dating behavior of heterosexuals in the United States. More work is necessary to determine if the findings so far also apply to international daters and to understand the dynamics of homosexual pairings.
Emerging methods may also bring new insight into dating dynamics. Finkel and Eastwick have begun using a coding scheme to study exactly what participants are saying during their dates, allowing them to potentially code what exactly makes a date great or awkward.
Is it better to communicate independence from or interdependence with your partner? References and Further Reading Eastwick, P. Selective versus unselective romantic desire: Not all reciprocity is created equal. Psychological Science, 18, — Sex differences in mate preferences revisited: It turns out that both women and men value traits such as kindnesswarmth, a good sense of humour, and understanding in a potential partner — in other words, we prefer people we perceive as nice.
Being nice can even make a person seem more physically attractive. Love is blind But of course, the social context matters as well. Consuming alcoholfor example, really can make everyone else appear more physically attractive. And my own research has shown that love sometimes really is blind.
People in romantic relationships, particularly new relationships, are biased in how they perceive their partners. Third, it seems that we like people who like us. This idea of reciprocity may sound very simple, but it has incredibly important implications for all relationships. Chat-up lines may sound like a bit of fun, but all romantic relationships are built on reciprocal self-disclosure — the mutual exchange of intimate information with a partner.
Psychologist on dating: there are no rules of attraction when it comes to meeting your match
Deciding when and how to disclose intimate information to a new partner is an important part of every romantic relationship and can be the difference between an honest, healthy relationship or a closed, stunted one. Also, playing hard-to-get almost never works.
Giving the impression of dislike is unlikely to spark attraction because it goes against the grain of reciprocity. We like what we know Finally, despite what many people think, opposites very rarely attract. In fact, decades of research has shown that attraction is most likely to be sparked when two people perceive themselves as being very similar to each other. It could be similarity in terms of sociodemographics — most relationships are formed between people who are similar in terms of age, social class, occupational background, and so on.
But more important than sociodemographics is similarity of values — everything from musical tastes to political orientation. But when someone agrees with us, they validate our worldviews and as result we want continuing contact with that person. One the difficulties with these sorts of predictions is that relationships are complex and often messy.