why does my ex randomly keep contacting me? | Yahoo Answers
My Ex Harassed Me Online for Months, So I Took Him to Court and Won Then he put my naked selfies on different online dating services, I was excited to dive into life again there, including meeting new people and dating, . Within the hour, I started getting more and more texts from strange numbers. Suddenly your texts aren't being answered, and you're imagining all the terrible more confident person when it comes to my own self-esteem and dating. mean I should let myself get so crushed if they don't want to see me again. . Teens allegedly start fight with year-old mother on being told they're. An ex who contacts you out of the clear blue sky is ALWAYS looking to rekindle fair amount of time to get over him and I started dating my current boyfriend. From what i Read, I wouldn't bother contacting him again because of what he did to you. . She has no interest in me because she texts me late?.
I was ghosted by someone I actually liked — here’s how I got over it
That night, one of the messages was from a guy who claimed to live close by and to be on his way to my home. Thankfully, he didn't show up. And this was only the first day, a Wednesday.
I thought, I can fix this. I felt pure panic. I sat on the floor near my front door with a can of pepper spray in my hand. I fell asleep that way, crying. There I found two videos of me masturbating. The descriptions listed my real name, my grad school, and phone number, and also included links to my Instagram, Twitter, and LinkedIn. I peeled myself off the floor and tried to carry on. I took the exam, but when I was finished, the administrator of the test told me a professor needed to see me.
The building was deserted-it was the end of the semester, and everyone was off for the summer. I went to his office, and he stumbled over his words as he tried to explain that there was something bad going on. He informed me that David had emailed the two videos of me masturbating to some of my classmates. They had been forwarded around and wound up with this professor.
It was like Whack-a-Mole dealing with every crisis and each hit represented another layer of my dignity being stripped away. I was indescribably paranoid. I sat in my apartment toggling between the websites and the profiles and the dick pics and the text messages.Why Your Ex Contacts You
One of my professors told me that he knew someone in law enforcement in Virginia. That detective got in touch with David and basically told him to knock it off. If you have something to say to me, grow up and say it to me directly. They were obviously in shock, but supportive.
It was also very apparent that my mom was worried more people, including my grandparents, would find out. Within twelve hours of our conversation, David had emailed the videos to my parents. That Monday, I filed the restraining order paperwork. My restraining order was ultimately granted. I had won a small battle, which momentarily renewed my hope for my future.
I started an internship that May. The challenge to function in the face of everything happening left me unable to perform to the best of my ability. My very first day, I had to miss a few hours to go to a hearing where a judge considered whether my temporary restraining order could become a permanent one. My parents pressed me to file a lawsuit, but I knew that if I did that, my name would be public.
For the rest of my life, anyone could google me and associate me with the photos. I felt so helpless. There was no California law about revenge porn yet. Through all of this, I never reached out to David. I completely cut him off. He was acting so psychotically, I was afraid to even engage.
But late one night, I got a call from David.
I had this internal struggle, because we had only been broken up for a little over a month. As if on cue, I got an email from Google Alerts-I had set one up for my name-and this showed that my photos had been added to yet another website. The constant fluctuation of emotion was almost too much to bear. I was consumed by his crushing and repeated retaliation. I wound up cutting my internship short.
Trying to track down all the photos and get them removed was already a full-time job. I connected with another lawyer who suggested something different: But if you have a copyright, like on a film, and a user uploads your film, you as the creator can ask the site to take it down.
My Ex Harassed Me Online for Months, So I Took Him to Court and Won $6.4 Million
All the photos that David was distributing were selfies-I took them myself on my phone. So I owned them. I registered my images with the U. Copyright Office and subsequently filed a lawsuit.
I feel sick just thinking about it but somewhere my naked photos are in the library of Congress. At least I had something to do, a step to take when the photos or videos popped up. Then the FBI got involved. I gave the agents all my evidence-the screen grabs, emails, everything-and they raided his home in September The next year, inCalifornia finally passed revenge porn legislation, and I was able to file a suit in federal court as a Jane Doe. We filed in December I felt an overwhelming sense of relief.
My career has progressed a little more slowly than I would have hoped. I had significant trouble interviewing because of the information that he had disseminated online.
I have my guard up constantly, and I second-guess my judgments when I meet new people. Dating is especially difficult, obviously. I do wonder if this experience has colored the way people who know about it think of me. Do they think I lack judgment? It waned over time.
He did not defend her in front of his family members, they fought constantly, he did not consider her feelings. This is a heteronormative exploration of dating rituals and for that reason a heteronormative article on said rituals. With a culture of ghosting, bread-crumbing, zombie-ingand just flat-out constant shuffling, I get that things seem inherently fragile out there, and lots of people want to insulate against rejection.
Here are two reasons why strength of pursuit is a problem, and one very important way to choose a better partner. It removes female agency. Because this storyline removes female agency from the equation. She let him choose her.
He dragged her step by step through various phases of commitment. Letting someone take you off the market, just because there seems to be a lot of interest there, is a defensive dating strategy that requires next to no vulnerability on your part.
You think that high levels of obvious interest will keep you from getting hurt which is not necessarily the case. Instead, you need to ask yourself who you want to pursue a relationship with — and then put yourself out there and let that person know.
Say you had a great time. However, I do want to point out that bombarding a person with texts, emails, calls, and compliments immediately is an early dating tactic.
There are tons of great guys who do not have time to text you all day; they have full-time jobs. The best relationships today are equal and continue to grow. Experts have consistently found that egalitarian marriages, where both parties are equal in all ways, are the happiest.